There are lots of wonderful gifts that you can give, but the best gift you can give her is to regularly pray for her and tell her what you are praying for her. This is especially crucial if you’ve experienced a recent conflict. It is very hard to stay angry at someone for whom you are praying.
Here’s a guide that I have developed from Proverbs 31 that I use in praying specifically for my wife and daughters. I offer it to you as a helpful tool.
- Make her a woman of noble character (31:10 – “An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels.”) Make her virtuous, morally excellent. May she hate sin and love Jesus more each day.
- Develop her into a diligent worker (v.17 – She girds herself with strength and makes her arms strong.) Give her strength for her tasks and the ability to discern the best from the good (Philippians 1:9 – making the excellent choice).
- Sensitize her to meet the needs of those around her (v.20 – “She extends her hand to the poor, and she stretches out her hands to the needy.”)
- Give her a proper perspective of the future (laugh and smile at it) (v.25 – “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future.”) Free her from undue anxiety and fear.
- Develop her into a faithful, wise and kind teacher (v.26 – “She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.”) The word “kindness” is the Hebrew word ‘hesed.’ It means covenantal, steadfast, unfailing, persistent love. The Apostle Paul would say that the goal of all Christian instruction is “love” (1 Timothy 1:5).
- Make her such a godly wife and mother that her children rise up and bless her; that I bless and praise her, saying: “Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.” (vv.28-29).
- Cause her to grow in her knowledge and fear of the Lord (v.30b – But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.”) Show me how I can encourage her spiritual growth.
- Help her to have a proper perspective on her outward appearance (v.30a – “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain.”)
- Free her from the tendency to compare herself with other women. Free her from an undue focus on externals for God does not look on the outward appearance but on the heart (1 Samuel 16:7).